Sunday, March 12, 2017

A good deal procrastination

I just wake up this morning, realize that I have 33 lectures to cover in 4 days (ICA on friday sobs)

and end up in the kitchen (lol) πŸ˜…

somehow I want to procrastinate, but still want to do something productive because being a person named syaheera, I sometimes even feel guilty to have a solid 9 hours sleep so yeah at least I deserve to have a decent breakfast and lunch so after 1.5 hours tung tang tung tang in kitchen I finally got a chance to eat......

pancake/crepe/lempeng english/whatever-you-name-it as long as it is food

I just realized to eat grape with this whatever-you-name-it is soooooo good, i am so brilliant in weird way I wish i can be this amazing during my final exam (lol unnecessary self-praise just iklan) i bought grapes from market and masam gilaaa like yes I love it, I can totally eat this kind of grape while finishing my 33 lectures, confirm dari ngantuk terus "terangkat" 

Yesterday I slept 530am uhm nope, not because I was busy revising (ibu called me 9am today and screamed "ya Allah tak bangun lagi budak ni dah pukul berapa ni????") but I blame 200% on youtube ughhhh i should uninstall youtube instead of instagram! Or, maybe i should uninstall both, if only i can uninstall whatsapp as well lol 

I could go from online shopping to ed sheeran's Shape of You at 3am and end up Ted Talk about North Korea at 5am. Random gilaaa, I can't brain myself. 

Trust me, watch this video below. Until the end. THE ENDDDDDDD not when he said thank you but THE ENDDDDDDDDD don't judge his english, he probably had a better grammar than you duhhh (grammar dia ok gila kot) but the content tu pergh i know this is sooo 3 years ago i dont care watch. again.

"Hope kept me alive" "One chicken wing can change your life"

Hati aku yang sebatu sebatu perempuan ni (i didnt cry watching any hindustan movie bhaijan bijan diwale whatever, syurga yang ditinggalkan or dirindukan) but this 13minutes ted talk video make me wailing under my duvet mcm putus cinta or somebody died lels 😭😭😭. Thankgod my flatmate all went back home for weekend 

"They wrote they were fed up with the sameness of everything"

I just feel grateful for what I have right now. Growing up in Malaysia is a nikmat but then somebody just don't realize it, they say they want sameness but can they afford the sameness 😷? Sameness here might be in different context but still can you deal with it? zz #bebelsyadindipagihari

goodluck syadin!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, March 7, 2017


(quickly writing this since lecture ends a bit early but still need to stay back because after this have this odd lecture but still waiting, probably have a lot of freebies such as free colgate and sensodyne so πŸ™ŠπŸ™Š)

I'm kind of impressed with my selfie skill

thanks for 11 years of practicing selfie (minus 10years from my age since theres no selfie when I was a kid)

last week early morning breakfast with the other malaysian dental students. I think they are legit nice person, especially when they are willing to wake up early on sunday just for a breakfast hahahaha.
Even I need to restrain myself from sleeping after subuh and end up playing games for 2 hrs because even if I wanted to sleep for one hour, it would end up 4 hrs instead. 

We study at the same dental hospital (except if upper year need to do clinical in other clinics) but we hardly see each other lels. At all. to the extent kak adeela ws me asking if i'm ok and hows my study progressing since we didn't meet and I replied "yes okay at least I'm still alive". Since we haven't meet for so long so there was alot things to chat and sembang sampai we stayed in Malaysian Hall for almost 4 hours

So before this we had dinner when I first came, but last weekend we had breakfast to wish goodluck for Abigail's last year final exam. She already fifth year and almost graduate and theres me...... 1st year *sigh* I love how they always pass down all the files such as revisions or question papers to the lower year it looks like a legacy thingy that revolve only within us lels. 

I remembered our last dinner, they sound sooo dentist using all these complex abbreviations and I, who just arrived for few weeks, didn't understand at all :)) But now I could somehow understand most of what were they talking and laughing as well, it kinds of fun gila to hear their clinical story and I can see myself doing more embarrassing syadin-dumb-and-dumber part 2387956 in clinics. 

We supposed to come in earlier than abigail since we need to write something on her goodluck card but then abigail came earlier than most of us.  And the card lol πŸ˜†πŸ˜† so when she came I was like hahahahah mission fail and hanya mampu berhuhuhu. So we end up quietly write on the card below the table, in front of abigail (probabyly) without her noticing hahah i crey so cute

I can't imagine myself doing my first extraction 😱😱. I can't imagine myself on the 5th year lol. I cant imagine myself graduate with wrinkles on my face and gray hair *cry inside* So the thought of abigail almost completing her course already make me feel happy and proud for her. All the best and congrats for getting job placement in uk! wuuuuuu πŸ’ž

Monday, March 6, 2017

mad skill

I still respect and salute those ppl who release their stress by cooking. Baking tu mcm boleh go lagi ah tapi memasak tu mcm lagi memberi stress kepada aku hahahah. And i used to dream to be a hsewife, nasib baik aku masih boleh ukur baju di badan sendiri gitu. Most of my classmates from lower form high school already knew my hopeless skills in cooking/ whatever-about-kitchen and they still make fun of it (sampai sekarang duk ungkit insiden air gula aku tak sudah). 

Tapi syaheera yang dulu bukanlah yang sekarang. Aku akan bangun pagi awal especially on weekend to cook and have a decent meal. But then one of my flatmate's friend came into the kitchen and then she asked me

"Aw do you enjoy cooking?"

"Er lol no, i cook just to survive"

Maka berdekah lah this girl dengar jawapan aku yang paksa rela ni apa yg lawak pun aku wonder gak

But then, now aku try utk meminatkan diri and masak dgn rela anytime aku ada masa, kalau class habis awal ke. Aku still amaze mcm mana kita campak campak bahan dia boleh jadi sejenis lauk mcm magic pulak. Now boleh lah masak untuk diri sendiri, itu pun lepas google resipi mcm "resepi ______ paling mudah" HAHAHAH paling mudah tu kena ada sebab syaheera is being syaheera. takda masa aku nak buat grand grand padahal utk diri sendiri je, masa pun takda, malas satu hal

But then ibu mesti akan supervise masakan aku, walaupun dari jauh. Letak gula lah garam lah air lah, buat aku wonder mcm mana ibu tahu masakan aku tawar ke kita record video keluar bau ke sense of taste ke? Tak mustahil 2020 whatsapp update ada send bau wakaka

And today aku masak salmon asam pedas (lol) and sup ayam, then ibu comment pasal rempah but i can't relate #ibuperluredha

masalah "rempah empat beradik" πŸ™ˆ

tu takda hal lah, ni aku panggil bunga lawang jadi bunga kelawang hahahaha ko kenapa din


let's hope this gal will get the hang of it

Thursday, March 2, 2017

we met, we tried

Piccadilly circus 27022017

Last weekend kan, seniors inform the first year dieorang nak tolong for our upcoming osce exam. Osce ni mcm oral clinical exam lah senang cerita. Masalah nya benda alah tu dia buat hari ahad so aku mcm berfikir nak pergi ke tak, nak ke taaaaak tapi mcm biasalah syaheera is being syaheera, nak buat salah pun bersalah gituw (cc bakal bakal mak mentua) so i just went while dragging mah both feet

So aku igt haritu dia just nak explain osce tu apa jadah rupanya ada mock sekali..... literally mock yg ada soalan each station and kau kena jawab. So ada 12 stations (kot) in a circuit, then station yg aku paling tak suka bila part dapat few scenario contohnya kita jumpa patients pastu kena selesaikan masalah dia.

Aku dah lah bangun pagi tu, nak aku selesaikan masalah org T_T and aku ni pulak mmg species yg ada 0% general knowledge about dentistry ( aku tak tahu what the hell is impression, i thought that first bad "impression" kind of thing but nahh. The only thing yg aku tahu kena gosok gigi 2 kali sehari that's it lol) pastu datang pulak mock osce mati lah aku

Bila kau ada 1 minute je nak baca scenario then kena hadap muka senior, dpt pulak white ppl berturut turut haaa entah kau faham ke dok aku mengarut nasib lah nak (dlm diam aku harap dia tak faham tp faham lah pulak). Ada 3 consecutive stations yg mindblow gila, tp aku mcm takpa syadin chill je ingat kat kmb kita belajar "kau taktahu kau goreng je elok elok confident tu penting!!!"

Aku  mcm siot jugak lah selalu buy time by kept  asking the patient questions  so sementara tu aku fikir dlm kepala otak dgn gelabah AIYO IBUUU WHAT I NEED TO ASK AFTER THIS!!!! Aku punya intro kenal kan diri je dah amik 30 saat (hehehehe) so bila dah hbis mengarut tu aku mcm just goreng je ah syadin nak buat mcm mana insyaAllah dia tak faham kau cakap apa, muka pokerface tu penting

Tapi aku terlupa lah diaorg ni semua 4th year students hahahah dia trap aku baik punyaaaa, aku punya process goreng tu masa minyak over panas so bukan setakat hangus tp rentung dah hahahah. Lets say aku bg 8 solutions or suggestions utk patient tu, 3 je betul lain semua info salah yg aku reka and buat theory sendiri, and the senior wrote feedbacks for everything i said what was wrong and which was right hahahah rip my future patients wakakaka mesti dlm hati dieorang bapak confident minah ni dgn poker face nya padahal semua salah

That's my syadin-feels-dumb part 783940, It's ok sometimes you win, sometimes you learn.

Wednesday, February 8, 2017

feel geeeeewd

I feel sooooo loved today. Just another day full with blessings, one after another yass even the little things! 

Today we had our presentation, and everyone literally had fun with this one yang mmg no pressure sbb this one takda carry marks and "just for fun" kind of presentation. So another big thing crossed out

A senior smiled and said hi back hahahahah i feel like my existence is indeed significant and bangga ah sikit sbb aku dah start ingat muka org, the last two times aku tak ingat muka senior............ jahat gila tapi aku tahu problem aku since seseri anyway and i felt so bad but today is an exception bruh

So harini the presentation session should be done by 1230pm but then dah habis on 11am hahahah gila ah literally each group buat in 5-10 minutes mmg tak ikhlas punya presentation ah, so we decided to go out of whitechapel and went all the way to central! Satu benda je yg aku risau kalau pergi central ni, mana aku nak solat hmmmm and I'm the only muslim among the 4 girls. nak cari fitting room pun mcm sometimes the workers kat situ terlebih friendly sampai dia akan usher ke fitting room and tanya "is everything ok" and panic bila aku tak jawab instantaneously sbb tgh solat lah kan so yeah 

BUT THEN THEY ARE SOOOOO UNDERSTANDING I CREY sbb masa tgh plan nak pergi central tu diaorg akan tanya aku dulu "when is your praying time? can you pray now or you have to wait?" terkezut iolls hahahaha sbb before ni kalau mkn during lunchtime with them aku akan rushing after makan sbb kena find a place to solat. 

And then one of them legit google kan utk aku praying room in central and found this one islamic centre in soho 😭😭😭 iolls so terharu sbb i was expecting myself to go to any random fitting rooms but she knew how to settle it waaaay better than me lels. And we off to leicester square and kena jalan for 15 minutes to go to the islamic center, and dia insist nak teman aku sbb the other two tak sampai lagi. Aku bgtahu it's ok i can find any fitting room and she said it's ok just pray at the prayer room there, no need to feel rush and pressure :( 

And bila dah jumpa tu, dia cakap dia tunggu dekat entrance je but then aku cakap lah it's okay boleh masuk and ddk situ while waiting for me sbb takkan lah aku nak biarkan dia sorang kat luar. Dia cakap boleh ke masuk hahahaha i said yass of course aku pun boleh masuk church dont worry hahahahah wth aku bab bab done dakwah ni mmg fail sikit hadis di dada tak berapa nak cukup utk support aku. And she felt soooo amazed to be in a big surau for the first time. Glad that she was fine with it! Diaorg mcm faham gila and sometimes dieorang yang tegur aku kalau aku ada bad hijab day and rambut terkeluar so i felt very grateful, this is all little things that feel like a blessing for me couldnt ask for more :(

And we went to japanese restaurant, I had salmon bento sedap gilaaaa. And dieorang dah faham sangat dgn aku yang tak makan veggies ni so dieorang selalu wonder apahal aku tak makan sayur, ibu ayah makan sayur tak,  aku ada constipation tak (wth hahahha), nanti dah ada anak mcm mana nak didik dia makan sayur (and aku reply "Then I would be the coolest mom ever I'm not going to force them to eat any veggies and be like me") and they insist me to try eat salad so aku try lah makan this small portion tapi dieorang gelak gila tgk reaction aku lels, salad is a big no-no for me. even though dieorang bising, dieorang still amik all my veggies portion ahhahaha call me weird or wth but i feel so loved bila aku tak makan that one thing and another person will finish it for meh 

Lepastu turned out dieorang ni matcha freak tau aduhai, aku ni pulak mmg matcha matcha ni aku tolak tepi. Not a tea-fan, so do you expect me to love matcha (?) aku masuk kedai tu je aku dah tanya ni kedai greentea ke kedai seaweed hahahahah bau dia mcm masuk ke hidung gitu. Dieorang insist aku try matcha in taster cup so aku try lah tp aku bebetul takleh braaaain literally rasa mcm seaweed di tastebud aku hahahaha asal lah org suka (?) So sbb aku betul betul tak suka, one of them bawak aku pergi next store yang jual frozen yogurt and got one for me! That's totally another blessing that need to be counted πŸ˜‰ 

when i count my blessing, i count you twice!

Tuesday, February 7, 2017


Guess who ady finished with her SBL3 and ICA3?!? It's meeeeeeh i'm back yalls at last i'm here to sort back my life and make sure everything is on track. And have one whole week self-reward and enjoying my #postICA moments before gather back all my senses that SBL4 and ICA4 are just in one month time duh no chill gilaaaa!!

So yeah today class end a bit early, habis 1pm dah macam wow nak buat kenduri pulut kuning! (harapaaaan) so aku kemas balik bilik aku yang never disappointing me in showing the ICA mode turn on. So usually I have this routine of masak everything on weekend, do laundry, shopping for groceries etc. Tapi now selasa baru ada masa nak fikir "my well-being is my priorities" so my cooking routine yang a bit overdue compensate dgn masak dua lauk sekali gus, definitely hashtag productive hashtag semangat membara hashtag postICA 

I even bought my tickets back to Malaysia for summer holiday yaaaaaaaaaaAAAAYYY that's totally my epitome of productive lah yang takleh bawak bincang. Ayah duk pressure "Eera bila nak beli ticket!!!" "Eera, tadi ayah check ticket mcm murah!" "Eera pls check website ni for tickets" and i was like AYAAAAH OK OK AFTER ICA OK (jangan procrastinate revise ya rakan rakan, nanti jadi mcm iolls) 

Oh and since kmb kan, aku ada this week of "puasa korea" which aku tak boleh tgk k-shows or dramas and not even listen to a single korean songs a week before exam. That's how pathetic my life is hahah kalau tak my iman turun naik and takkan tetap, will end up spending hours watching them and lagu akan terngiang ngiang to the extent it was sooo distracting sampai aku buat exam background lagu exo pergh amik kau! So now, it's time to get back on track and buka puasa sekarang yay!

Last weekend, Aisyah and Su were here in London! Lepastu kan lepas diaorang balik bilik terus rasa sunyi :( haih mcm tu lah rasa bila parents went back to Malaysia, tiba tiba rasa bilik aku yang sekangkang kera ni mcm besar je and sunyi 😭But guys, I promise you guys my guest service would be waaaaaaaay tip top than that day if you guys come again and not during my weekend ICA :( Datang lagi okies

I brought Aisyah to eat burger and lobster 😍😍And yeah aku sebagai ahli active club the cheapskate; Malaysian in London edition, burger & lobster is waaaay out of my budget. That was my first time there even though i've been here for almost 5 months ady. So aku decide since aku dah berjimat for almost 4 months straight, this february is gonna be my bulan segala pembaziran dan enjoy. Plus, they were coming as well so I might just join them enjoy all the money sementara aku ada kawan nak berhu-haaaa. 

And aku a bit strict in sorting living expenses yang orang akan wonder asal jimat sangat dia ni, i'm totally not going (insyaAllah in the future as well) to ask extra money from parents cmon guys we are 21 already! But since everyone dah enjoy duit sponsor awal awal and now dlm kesempitan hidup, my heart feel at ease the fact that I still got some money to enjoy at the end of the month. Delayed gratification isn't it!!!!!?

Papehal pun sedap doh lobster dia, rasa mcm lobster...... (lobster mmg lah rasa lobster wth)

Dalam bilik aku ada this map of London, and then if I go to a place aku akan mark the map with thumbtack acah "I've been there" gitu so there's alway some place yang aku reserve and tak pergi lagi so that I can go with my friends when they are coming to London. So baru seghonok bila explore london sama sama instead of "aku dah pergi sini 9 kali dah bawak org" hehehe but thats not applicable to cliche tourist attraction mcm big ben lah buckingham palace, tower bridge dah mcm yeah im here.... again :)

Tapi the downside of me being a tourist guide is- half of the pictures in the camera gallery is not the tourists' picture but mine hahahahah sampai aisyah tak tahu lah siapa yang baru sampai london sbb gambar aku sama banyak dgn gambar dia. Ye laaah bawak lain orang feeling dia lain ye dokkk?

But I reaaaaaaaaaaaaaally love M&M world and still cant get over it 

Syurga duniyaaaaaaaaa

The mix colour

And the customize one!

Definitely gonna give this to my future children (acah) and tell them be proud superkid, you are supereera's son or daughter for a reason ya know *cringe gila* 

Excuse me for my existence *face palm*

And next to this green m&m kan ada this one part where you kind of scan yourself and then there's machine that tell you what is your colour mood for today, and we both got blue!!! I got blue, Aisyah got light blue. Blue is something about cool and stylish so aku mcm penipu gila machine ni but sokey that comforts me well and enough to make my day πŸ™ˆ Light blue is something about expecting new challenges in life etc

And then the next store, there are lego store and nickelodeon but i'm not a big fan almaklum lah dibesarkan main batu seremban tanah liat dan kartun anak-anak sidek *giggles*

really love the front back view, it is all made by lego peh aku main setakat jadi kubu pertahanan pun dah bangga dah lol

Apahal do dia ni.........

And baru sedar that if I'm not going to be a dentist, I should do voice over for cartoon! lols baru sedar aku boleh tiru suara The Map dalam cartoon Dora the Explorer, so we went out from the nickelodeon store with me who felt ecstatic and non-stop nyanyi lagu "i'm the map, i'm the map, IM THE MAAAAP!!!" sampai aisyah stress 😈

Me fetauring Aisyah yang stress

And later su pulak sampaaaai but we didnt have many decent pictures sbb su datang terus jemah ya Allah terus susah nak tidur bila gossip diutamakan ni 

I’m used to it, the footsteps coming and going, the goodbyes

Thursday, January 26, 2017


Lately, my sleep cycle is no longer a cycle. Dah macam reversible reaction yg ulang alik, hah ambik kau hahahaha. Sleep awake sleep awake sleep awake. Harini dah 3 kali aku tidur, it didn't sounds like a nap but not really a long sleep. Maybe because of 2 nights stay up so the body has its after effects not the next day but a few days after. Nasib baik ibu call me everyday for subuh kalau tak..... *sigh*

Last few daaaays kan, I had this practical for OSCE in mile end. The bad side was this gonna be a day of almost 1 hour return walk, the bright side; walk is the one and only exercise i'll be having in london hahahaha totally not gonna spend money on gym! Practical tu best gilaaaaa omg (for me the noOb), even though it was only auscultation and measure blood pressure hahaha. 

Best because that was literally the first time eveeeeeer I used stethoscope (kot of course the legit stethoscope lahh not the one Qaseh punya mainan) and machine blood pressure yang pump pump tu. Before this seseri's lab just ada the automatic blood pressure machine so thats not fuuuun. The "sphygmomanometer" (literally google sbb tak reti eja) tu kitaorg tak baca the manual how to use so just main guna sbb nak "fun learning", so my coursemate dia salah buat so it didnt constrict the blood vessels but then the straps suddenly inflated so dah mcm balloon dah lels. They even pump so hard sampai in position nak pump chest for cpr hahah thank god im not dumb alone

And we wonder what if this happens in real life in front of the patients hahahah mesti patients mcm tak menyakin kan nyaaa dia ni biar betul.......

And kena cari heart pulse at the wrist and it kinds of normal bila susah nak jumpa heart pulse tu. Aku pun tak perasan everytime cari for the pulse, aku buat this one facial expression yang mcm apahal-tak-jumpa-do face, so dieorang gelak mcm tak igt dunia dah. Kalau tak jumpa jugak start dah buat drama "are you goblin?" "uhm, sir i think my patient is a ghost. there's no pulse at all" 

paling jakun when i used the pink stethoscope and then letak on my chest. The sounds of the pumping heart is sooooo πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“πŸ’“ especially when it's my own heart hahaha i couldnt stop listen to it, the im-proud-of-my-heart-it-beats-for-20years moment serious takleh blaaah. Rasa macam jagebang sangat (jakun gembira bangga lels)

So yeah love yourself yeah (tiba tiba lol), if you feel penat hidup yang takda makna or lost in the pain of heart break tu remember at least you can sleep to hve a rest and have brand new day but your heart never had a chance at all. So be grateful! Hashtag tazkirah drpd osazah syadin

-anyway, one thing that I can't brain everytime i ask questions to the lecturer, they alwaaaays ask me back "hm what do you think" dlm hati aku dah ya Allah kalau aku tahu lah jawapan im not here, nak fikir apa pun tak tahu dah - so, my response always something that worth a face palm 😎😎😎

agi idup agi ngelaban for the upcoming exam!